Rockies: Dickerson, Christmas, LeMahieu, Janet Jackson Zone

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According to manager Walt Weiss, Rockies left fielder Corey Dickerson could wake
up, roll out of bed and hit on Christmas morning. (John Leyba, The Denver Post)

There seems to be some confusion among hard-core Rockies fans on two important, crucial topics.

No. 1: Why do I tweet “Merry Christmas” when Corey Dickerson gets a hit?

Corey DickersonNo. 2: What is this stuff about second baseman DJ LeMahieu being in the “Janet Jackson Zone.”

Let’s start with No. 1.

It’s really quite simple. Manager Walt Weiss frequently refers to
Dickerson as a “natural born hitter.” So good, and so natural, in fact,
Weiss has said: “Dickie could wake up, roll out of bed and hit on
Christmas morning.” Hence, “Merry Christmas.”

Weiss has also said Dickerson could “hit under water,” and Dickerson could “hit in his sleep.”

I prefer the Christmas morning reference, even if I don’t quite get
it. But, as a reader pointed out, Weiss’ reference is not unique or
original. Former Kansas City Royals GM John Schuerholz once said:
“George Brett could roll out of bed on Christmas morning and hit a line
drive.”

Dickerson said he now gets tweets and messages from fans and friends with Christmas themes attached. It seems to be catching on.

OK, now on to No. 2. This one is weird, way out of left field and the
result of an inside joke between too strange sports writers.

As a singer, Janet Jackson knew her limitations and still became a star. (The Associated Press)

As a singer, Janet Jackson knew her limitations and still became a star. (The Associated Press)

I was driving to Surprise, Ariz., during spring training along with
my good friend Thomas Harding of MLB.com. We were passing the time
listening to an oldies station when a Janet Jackson song came on the
radio.

I remarked to Thomas that I never thought Janet Jackson could sing.

“It’s all electronics and background vocals and stuff,” I said.

Thomas, who considers himself something of a pop music expert, disagreed.

“Janet could sing a little bit,” he said. “She just knew what songs
to sing, and she knew to stay within her range. Kind of like DJ LeMahieu
on offense.”

I’m usually not shocked by anything Thomas says, but this one caught me off guard.

“So you are equating DJ LeMahieu to Janet Jackson?” I asked.

“Yes, it’s the perfect analogy,” Thomas insisted.

So, the next day, unbeknownst to Thomas, I informed Weiss of the
LeMahieu-Janet Jackson connection. Weiss was, shall we say, perplexed,
if not slightly amused.

That night, LeMahieu hit a double in a Cactus League game.

“As DJ was running to second base, all I could think of was ‘wardrobe malfunction,” Weiss deadpanned.

Last Wednesday night in San Francisco after the Rockies beat the Giants, I asked Weiss, “Is DJ still in the Janet Jackson zone?”

Root Sports was still on the air. All Weiss could do was laugh, look
around the room and blame Thomas for instigating me. (He didn’t, by the
way).

Root’s Jenny Cavnar gave me an “I-can’t-believe-you-asked-that look.”

I can’t either.

So now you know the rest of the story.

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