Last week, I appeared on Ireland’s most popular TV programme, The Late Late Show.
On arrival, I was informed that Heather Mills, former wife of Beatles legend Sir Paul McCartney, was also a guest.
whole torso erupted into spontaneous violent spasms of shock and
horror, until the producer laughed and explained she had pre-taped her
segment and had now left the building.
To say we have history together is like saying the Bush family had ‘a bit of previous’ with Saddam Hussein.
My whole body spasmed with horror when I thought for a moment I had to see Heather Mills on a chat show taping the other week
I introduced Heather to Paul at a charity event in 1999.
was a moment that his daughter Stella later thanked me for with the
immortal words: ‘Dad’s really grateful, you cost him $50 million.’
their bitter divorce battle, in which Heather tried to single-handedly
destroy Paul’s reputation, I issued a public apology to the singer,
declaring: ‘I’m sorry Macca for ever introducing you to this little
She rang me the next day, screaming abuse down the phone.
I have already apologized publicly for the fact I introduced the
couple at a charity event in 1999, which led to their ill-fated marriage
‘Why the f*** are you doing this to me?!!!’
‘Because you’re behaving appallingly,’ I replied, calmly.
After more foul-mouthed invective, she suddenly paused, lowered her voice and sneered:
‘I know why you’re doing this.’
‘Because you’re a Paul fan.’
She spat out those last words like a Cobra that had just been poked with a stick.
The truth is that I was, and am, a Paul fan.
I think he and John Lennon were the greatest composers of my lifetime, and I greatly admire the way he leads his life.
His first marriage, to Linda, was famously one of the best, most true and solid, relationships in showbusiness.
His second, to Heather, will go down as one of the worst.
their divorce, she’s continued – despite the fact they have a child
together – to spitefully denigrate him in public as he has kept a
dignified, almost heroic, silence.
But even by her standards, her performance on the Irish show was as contemptible as it was deluded.
insisting she ‘didn’t want to talk about Paul’, she then, of course,
proceeded to do little else, hilariously dismissing Paul’s entire music
catalogue as ‘a few cool songs in the ‘60s and ‘70s’.
That preposterous claim, though, paled by comparison to this excruciating statement:
I go down the street,’ she said, ‘all I get is kids coming up to me.
Half of them don’t even know who he (Paul) us. That’s why he’s got to do
songs with Rihanna and Kanye West, so people remember who he is. I have
people going “Oh my God, you’re the ski racer” or ‘You help animals”. I
own the biggest vegan company in the world, most of the money I earn
goes to helping animals, disabled kids, landmine clearing charities,
things that are changing the world.”
I literally laughed out loud when I watched her say all this.
Heather is deluded. She claimed she is stopped on the street by
people who have no idea who Paul is – and then thank her for helping
animals because she has a vegan company
Mills is such a fantasist she claimed Paul made music with
artists like Rihanna and Kanye West, pictured here with Paul at daughter
Stella’s show this month, so people will know who he is
First, because I suspect performing with Paul McCartney was a dream
come true for both Rihanna and Kanye, as it is for almost every singer
in the world. The Beatles, like Elvis and Sinatra, remain the gold
standard for any popular musician, however young or old. And Paul’s the
only genius from the three still alive – no offence to Ringo.
because I doubt a single teenager in the entire world would ever
recognise Heather Mills in the street, let alone identify her as a
ski-racer or animal saviour.
Throughout the interview, Heather was
her usual prickly, defensive and unpleasant self. And the show’s host,
Ryan Tubridy, is one of the nicest people you could ever wish to meet.
encounter perfectly summed up what Heather Mills is really like, and I
speak from bitter personal experience as someone who was taken in by her
myself for a while.
She’s a total fantasist.
liar for whom the truth never gets in the way of a self-aggrandising
yarn. Don’t take my word for it, take the words of the judge in her
divorce whose damning conclusions were effectively that she’s a greedy,
ghastly creature prone to ‘make-belief’. He also said there was no
actual evidence to support her much-vaunted claim to donate most of her
earnings to charity.
I believe Heather married Paul McCartney for
his fame, money and to further her own career. The same Paul McCartney
she now so gleefully trashes.
If it wasn’t for those reasons, then
she wouldn’t have taken his millions (She was awarded $25,000 for every
single day she was with Paul, the marital equivalent of winning the
Lottery), or continue speaking about him on TV.
live off the proceeds of the staggering global success she claims to now
enjoy, and the fame of the world’s youth mobbing her in the streets.
Only we all know both those claims are utter nonsense.
Paul has since remarried for a third time, to a delightful American lady called Nancy Shevell.
By chance, two years ago, I shared a British Airways special services VIP car with her at Heathrow Airport.
was just the two of us, sitting in the back and we exchanged very
cordial conversation without ever mentioning the elephant in the room.
The current Mrs. McCartney, the delightful Nancy Shevell, is the
anti-Heather. Seen here between Paul and Stella’s husband at Stella’s
show this month, she is beyond loathe to ever use her husband’s name
(‘Hey! I’m the schmuck who put Paul together with Heather!’ didn’t seem like a very wise opening gambit).
When we arrived at the immigration desk, Nancy was grilled for ten minutes by a stern-faced UK officer.
Their exchange grew increasingly comical.
‘Why are you travelling alone?’
‘My husband had to stay behind and work in Los Angeles.’
‘What does he do?’
‘He’s a musician.’
‘So what kind of work has compelled him to stay in America?’
‘It’s a charity event.’
‘Is he a good musician?’
‘Yes, I think so.’
And so the interrogation went on.
But Nancy never once played the ‘I’m married to a Beatle’ card, nor even used his name.
She just patiently answered all the questions until she was allowed to proceed.
I walked up to the same officer afterwards and said:
‘That lady’s husband is Paul McCartney.’
The officer turned bright red and began hyper-ventilating.
You don’t see Nancy giving TV interviews or using Paul to further her career.
She didn’t marry him for his money, she’s very wealthy in her own right.
Nor does she seem to have to slightest interest in basking in the residual glory of his fame.
She just loves him for who he is, and that’s why Paul looks so happy these days.
All of which is clearly driving Heather up the wall.
But the more she attacks a living legend, the more ridiculous she looks.
You need Help, my little monster, just Let It Be.
All My Loving, Piers.
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